Urgh!!!! Guys are sooo stupid… Like there’s this guy I really like and he’s being such a guy and not doing anything about it. In fact he’s almost treating me like a dude which freaking sucks!! someone please understand 

I am a fairly stable girl… I don’t get angry all the time and I don’t get into fist fights. People think that I am a sweet girl with nothing wrong in her life. Some people know things about me I didn’t tell them… things they should not know. Some of my friends know about my real life but I have never told any of them everything. Yes my life really does honestly suck and no matter how hard I try to hide it from the world, the more people know. I don’t feel so stable anymore. I feel like I could go off at anytime and say so much that I truely don’t mean and that scares the hell out of me. I can’t be certain when or if I will ever explode but when and if I do, I don’t know who to go to for help. Once it got so bad that I almost did something I truely regretted. I however was able to control myself but now, I am not in possession of that self control any more. It kills me inside to see myself like this and to see my friends everyday and it hurts even more when I tell them that there is nothing wrong… I am just so afraid of the future… but I dare not look into the past, for going back is even worse. I have made so many mistakes in my life and I wish I could undo every single one of them but I can’t. Someone please help me… I am so lost and afraid. I don’t know what to do or say anymore. I need help. And on this dreary morning those are my last words to you… Help Me… Please Help Me.

Okay, so I was messing around with my computer’s recorder thingy, and later once it is finished, I will upload the song that I am writing. See, my so called friend jacked the first song I wrote, so I am writing this one in secret…so SHHHH! No one tell her that I am doing this or she will kill me!